Monday, December 13, 2010

From darkness to light: Coping through loss and sorrow

The black fog descends. It can be pretty overwhelming when it happens. So much so that it is easy to go into autopilot and be lured into simply laying back into the darkness, letting it take over almost completely. Easy to shut out family and friends and all those who care about us. Listening instead only to the stereophonic sadness that surrounds us. Eyes glazed over by the darkness, coloring our perspective in grey hues. Obscuring everything we see and mutating it into just another reason to be sad. Stopping our forward movement and miring us in a quicksand of despair. OK, seriously, how yucky is that? Be honest though. Suffer a loss or two and it's all too easy to find yourself in this place. Looking only through the glasses of loss and sorrow. Questioning yourself and your worth. Interesting how the darkness can be so alluring yet so devastating...

...but then there was light. It's there you know. If you dare to peek over the top the dark glasses of gloom and sadness, you can see it up ahead. A radiant glow that reminds you there is still light and goodness out there, even when you feel the most surrounded. And if you really pay close attention, you can notice that the light emanates from within you. It's that inner light that connects you to the light in the world around you; reminding you that you are never really alone. But you have to be aware of it to recognize what it is; you have to rely on the memory of having felt it before. And when you're really, really sad it's hard to be aware of much. But, I promise, it's there if only you will look for it and remember that you have felt it before (which means you're capable of feeling it again). And when you open up to the light that is inside you, even if it's just a tiny speck to begin with, it will overwhelm the darkness. Think about it. Bring a box of darkness into a light room and open it up. What happens? The light consumes the darkness. It has no effect. But bring a small light into a dark room and what happens? The room lightens up. The light is a reminder that you are capable, you are gifted, and you are loved. It is the response to the darkness that we all have inside us. It is the trump card to sadness. Yes, of course, light and dark live within us simultaneously. We humans are designed that way. But even though our initial reactions may be involuntary, ultimately we have a choice about where we spend our time. So which will you choose, the powerful gift of the light or the devastating allure of the dark? Either way, the choice is always yours...

Be happy and well,
Sari Roth-Roemer

2 comments:

  1. Thanks Dr. Sari, that was a good one. I recently lost my sweet Mother and am still hurting.

    ReplyDelete
  2. It's hard to keep perspective after something so difficult, isn't it. Wishing you the peace, comfort, and light that comes with time and healing.

    ReplyDelete